THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize