I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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