Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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