I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
