no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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