I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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