I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
bring money and cleavage
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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