You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
As shirtless as possible
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
