Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
we should paint friendship bongs
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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