Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
