you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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