i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize