toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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