she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
