Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
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Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
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yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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