I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize