is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
