He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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