he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I supernannyed him into submission
Randomize
