I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
