nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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