i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
