What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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