i was born a porn star she said
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
