now i know why i became what i already was.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
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