Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
