I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
