Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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