do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
