I got chris browned last night
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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