i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
