Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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