She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I still have a little drunk in my system
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Randomize
