dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I forgot how hot balto sounded
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
