Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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