I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
if i can run in heels then i can drive
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
