A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
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