she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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