I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
