your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
