32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
