PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
