Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(323): View more from California

I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.

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(208): View more from Idaho

And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you

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(561): View more from Florida

I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter

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(856): View more from New Jersey

he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

no pressure.

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19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
Read it at the TFLN blog
(813): View more from Florida

Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.

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(785): View more from Kansas

Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?

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(315): View more from New York

sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off

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(703): View more from Virginia

As a home can we vote to stab Peter?

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