I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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