Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
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