I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
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