wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize