I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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