wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
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