What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
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