I love black thongs
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
